Support in a Crisis and/or When You Feel Alone Military
Support in a Crisis and/or When You Feel Alone
Throughout your life, you are likely to face and overcome any number of crises.
You may experience the loss of a loved one, you may go through a divorce or you may experience a natural disaster.
Knowing who to turn to for support during a crisis can help you feel less overwhelmed and more able to manage your feelings and reactions.
Depending on the nature of the crisis, you may need direction as to the next steps to take, you may need medical support, or you may just need a listening ear and a shoulder to lean on or you just may need to VENT!
The next time you face a crisis on your own, use these tips to help you cope while it's happening and recover more quickly afterward:
Let others know you need support, and be specific about what you need. Tell a trusted friend or relative about the crisis. Don't assume that the people close to you know that you need help. (they probably do not know) The more specific you are, the more likely you are to find the kind of help you need.
Develop a strong support system, and consider joining a support group.
New and old friends, neighbors, classmates, or people from your military unit may be happy to assist you once they know you need help.
There are groups for almost every difficult situation, such as natural disasters, specific illnesses, the death of a relative, or divorce.
Express your feelings.
You may want to keep a journal or send short email messages about your feelings to people you trust.
These can help you feel connected to people without actually seeing them.
Be patient with yourself, and try to keep up your routines.
You may need more time to deal with a crisis if you don't have a partner or support network of family or friends.
Having a schedule for your activities will help to keep you moving forward in a crisis.
Reduce your stress.
Ways to decrease stress include eating healthy meals, getting plenty of rest, and exercising regularly.
Many people find they can decrease stress by meditating, reading a book, journaling, and listening to music.
Crafts, hobbies, and learning to do something new can also take your mind in a different direction! Libraries and craft groups may also be helpful.
Most of the time we cannot alter our circumstances. It is what it is. But, anything that can take your mind into a new direction instead of wanting to focus on the issue may be a way to help you. Box breathing, attending a church, synagogue, or place of worship, and becoming involved in activities is another possibility. Brainstorm other ideas!
Focus on the things you can control and change.
In a crisis, you may feel that many aspects of your life are out of your control and they be as well.
Focus on the things you can accomplish, and work to make improvements in those areas.
Feeling like you are in control of some things may make it easier for you to deal with the things you cannot control. It may take some time to find those things you can control so get a notebook, and keep working on a list. List what you can control, change, or stop doing. You decide what to list!
Finding support if you are ill or injured
Experiencing a medical crisis comes with its own unique challenges and circumstances, but with some careful thought and planning, you may feel better prepared for them.
Keep in mind that most of us do not go about planning for disasters of any kind, however, it is a good idea in some ways.
The following tips are designed to help you find support if you are feeling unable to cope on your own:
Make a list of people who could help in a health crisis.
Work with healthcare providers to draw up a list of needs you may have, such as hospital visits, home health care, and transportation to appointments. Most entities have access to provide you with a social worker.
List the people who could do the tasks, so you'll have an idea just how many people you might need.
Find a friend or relative who can help you manage your care. In a health crisis, you may have more needs than you can manage effectively on your own. Look for a friend or relative who can help. Remember for some things, like phone calls, research, etc. you can ask someone who does not even live around you!
Also, we have the option to order groceries, etc. so someone could just pick it up and drop it off!
Think about whether you would benefit from using a patient advocate. Patient advocates speak on a patient's behalf and help monitor his or her medical care. They may help research your treatment options, work with your doctors and nurses, and negotiate with your insurance company. They also have experience to help you anticipate and understand other needs you may have done the road.
Look into national organizations that can help. Many national groups help people cope with specific health conditions. To find groups for people with your health concern, search the Internet for the name of your condition and "organization" or "association." You can also get a referral from your doctor. And remember! someone can also do that for you if they have a phone and access to the internet! VA Caregiver Support Program https://www.caregiver.va.gov/
If you feel overwhelmed or unable to cope No one should have to struggle alone. Sharing your feelings with family and friends and reaching out to clergy or counselors can be productive and therapeutic, especially in times of crisis. Today there are many help and warm lines and chat lines for people to use as well. Sometimes it is comforting to speak to someone who does not know you. There is no shame or weakness in acknowledging that you're having trouble coping. Not reaching out is a much worse choice when you are vulnerable. The military can provide you with further resources and help you connect with a non-medical counselor. You can reach them by phone at 800-342-9647 at the National Resource Directory.
Finally, remember that even if you feel alone, you aren't alone. There are many people - whether you know them now or not - and organizations that are ready and willing to provide the support you need.
By planning ahead and reaching out to them, you'll be better able to manage if and when you are faced with a crisis, which may bring great peace of mind in the present.
Crisis Symptom Reporting Guide
When the Veteran you care for is in a medical crisis, your ability to observe symptoms and report accurately could be lifesaving. During this stressful time, you may find it difficult to think or function as clearly as you normally would. Below is a list that will help you remember what to look for during a crisis. It is a good idea to read this list ahead of time so you have some idea of what to expect, and then tuck a copy in the patient file you created for the Veteran for later reference.
What time did the problem start?
What was the Veteran doing when the problem started?
Do you know or suspect what might have caused the problem?
What was the first symptom that you noticed?
What other symptoms/complaints do you remember?
Did the symptoms come on abruptly or gradually?
Was the Veteran given any medication or medical treatment just before the problem started? If so, what was it?
Did the Veteran say anything about how he or she felt when the problem started and/or as it progressed? What was it?
Does the Veteran have a history of this kind of problem? If so, what was the previous diagnosis?
What did you do to try to help the Veteran between the time the problem arose and the time you arrived in the emergency room or the doctor’s office?
Did something work well? Seem to make things worse?
When to Call for Help. When is a crisis a crisis? When should you call someone else for help? Get help whenever the Veteran is in medical distress and you aren’t sure what to do.
Call your local rapid-response number
(e.g., 911) or an ambulance if the Veteran:
Is unconscious.
Has unexplained chest pain or pressure.
Is having trouble breathing or is not breathing at all.
Has no pulse.
Is bleeding severely.
Is vomiting blood or bleeding from the rectum.
Has fallen and may have broken bones.
Has had a seizure.
Has a severe headache and/or slurred speech.
Has pressure or severe pain in the abdomen that does not go away.
Is unusually confused or disoriented.
and lastly, if you just feel something is not right but you cannot put your finger on it! Go with your gut.
Also Call for Help If:
Moving the Veteran could cause further injury.
The Veteran is too heavy for you to lift or help.
Traffic or distance would cause a life-threatening delay in getting to the medical center. Much of this list came from a list on the http://www.va.gov/ website from some years ago.